


Dissecting a Dead Dove

by Aurendel



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Clones, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Freeform, Gen, Hurt No Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:07:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25961050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aurendel/pseuds/Aurendel
Summary: This is not the story you're looking for. It is an inquiry, a speculation. Where, exactly, *do* little clones come from?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Dissecting a Dead Dove

**Author's Note:**

> If anyone who is braver than I am would like to turn this -- essay? Article? Brain purge? -- into a story, please help yourself.
> 
> Beware: you have been warned.

What are little clones made of?

All right, I'm not a scientist, nor do I play one on tv. But I am a karking nerd with a good general knowledge of science (why, yes, I *do* watch Nova and Nature and read scientific articles, thank you). I'd be happy to be corrected by more knowledgeable persons, because, frankly, a little knowledge is a *scary* thing.

Here's the thing. In the Real World (TM), in order to clone an organism, you first need an ovum. You remove the nuclear DNA from the nucleus of the ovum, inject the nucleus with the desired target DNA, and let it start dividing and growing. Ova are essential to the process because they contain the necessary organelles and stored nutrients to support the zygote's early development into an embryo. Somatic cells and spermatozoa lack this specialization.

So, if Star Wars cloning proceeds in similar fashion, where did the kaminoans get the ova?

It's at this point dissecting this idea starts getting really ugly.

Males don't produce ova, only females do. So clearly Jango didn't provide any. Ok, he supposedly had a sister in the fridge--I mean, asylum--but, really? That's not pretty.

Yeah, the DNA Jango donated would've come from somatic cells, possibly bone marrow (stem cells), as gametes only have half the genetic information. An uncomfortable, somewhat invasive procedure, but minor outpatient stuff.

Ova, though? That's major abdominal surgery, even if it's robotic-laser-laparoscopic-whatever. A serious procedure to volunteer for! Do you suppose some of the female trainers of the Cuy'Val Dar, like Rav Bralor, might've gotten a hefty bonus for such a contribution? I can't imagine Isabet Reau signing up for that.

And here's another thing. Somatic (body) cells like bone marrow grow back, generally. Ova don't. That's right, girls. You are born with all the ova you will ever have. A few hundred, roughly. That's all. So if the Kaminoan cloning methods resemble the Real World, it would take the ova of thousands of women to produce a million and more clones. 

And I'm certain no female Kaminoans are making this sacrifice for !Science(TM).  
They are not genetically compatible, nor philosophically inclined.

So where did they get thousands of human women to provide the fruits of their ovaries?

The deeper we dig, the worse it gets.

Remember how I said girls are born with a full complement of ova? Well, technically, the Kaminoans don't need *women* as such. Just the ova extracted from infant females which are then themselves redundant to the mass production of clones. 

So all the cloners need to do is have an original donor, who is cloned herself, for a self-sustaining bank of ova that can be kept frozen until ready for use. Cheap, too, since the ova-providing female clones need not be sustained to maturity.

There's a very sick joke somewhere in there, but you'll have to insert it yourself. I can't seem to muster up the requisite dark humor.

Makes you wonder, though, if anyone tested the mitochondrial DNA of the clones, could they find out the identity of their mother? Or mothers?

Or are we all better off never knowing?

I'm only sayin'.

**Author's Note:**

> Please discuss.


End file.
